Ok seriously, why aren't people buying this game? IT'S AWESOME, PEOPLE!
For people who don't take too well with TPS (third-person shooter) games - and most RPG players do not deviate beyond their genre in the FIRST place - the game has an autotargeting system. It's easy as pie to lock onto an enemy and blow the crap out of them. Controls? Super easy. Camera? Not so easy but there's a tutorial and LOTS of time for you to get used to it. So tell me, people of the world: WHY ARE YOU NOT PLAYING THIS GAME?
The plot is subatomic, which is my new phrase for something way above awesomeness. Like Advent Children, it doesn't really answer any questions about the original game but still focuses on that world and its events, and takes place after AC. The WRO, headed by Reeve (whose last name is Tuesti and who is also extremely HAWT) continues where ShinRa left off...only, y'know, not evil. Part of WRO's rehabilitation is to eliminate any shred of ShinRa and rebuild. Midgar, which we all know was blown to crap, is being relocated to several splinter cities around that area, including Edge. Vincent is hired by Reeve to assist in this, and in the process meets up with the Deepground Soldiers, which are all offshoots (i.e; clones) of Genesis.
Oh.. maybe it would be a better idea to start with Crisis Core and THEN play this game... A lot of things in DC don't make too much sense unless you've played CC. Especially the stuff about Genesis. Plus i love that part where Sephiroth tells Genesis he can just rot. That was... classic. Yeah, play CC and then DC. Anyway...
Okay, okay, you're telling me you've seen the YouTube videos and are totally unimpressed. I don't care. Play it anyway; give it a chance. This once, don't listen to the critics...except me. If you're any sort of FFVII fan, you're gonna love this. If you're a Vincent fan, a Yuffie fan, or (if they exist) Cait Sith fan, PLEASE give this a chance. If you're any sort of Gackt fan.... the intro and the ending song are both from Gackt (Longing and Redemption, respectively).
You will love Azul, you'll hate hate hate hate HATE Rosso (GAH! I love every chance i get to kick her fur-wearing, slutty ass around!), you'll be annoyed by both Shalua and Shelke (quit TALKING), you'll question the relationship between Nero and Weiss (Video! **Spoiler warning on video... you might just wanna skip to the 3:00 mark*** ), and question if Vincent really is Sephiroth's father (Lucrecia....gets around...)
All in all, it's the EXPERIENCE of the game that's the driving force. And after you play this, if you're still feeling the urge to blow sh!t up, go warm up your 360 and play Bioshock. Who says first-person shooters can't have good plots!
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Arr, it be time for PIRATES!
Okay, i love Pirates of the Carribean. I really, really, really love Pirates! And not just because of Johnny Depp. I like the mythology of Davy Jones and Tia Dalma, and i really like the ending of At World's End. SUPER. The games spawned from the movie, however...suck. I blame Bethesda, because they make everything suck.
(I'll put a pic here when i can. Work computers suck!)
Basically, you're Jack and Will and Lizzy, in some asinine story that doesn't even make sense. Jack and the others are strung by their necks by...someone....and Jack is trying to get out of it by telling a batch of nonsequiter stories, including when Elizabeth's house got raided by pirates. Despite Lizzy's voice-over remark ("I don't remember any of that happening!") Jack is shown saving Miss Swann's life while her posh house burns. And she can fight with a sword. Next scene, Will and Jack are traipsing through some jungle trying to find a treasure, for no reason. There's even an ice level and a Far East level, but that's as far as i got before i gave the game away to someone else.
The selling point of the game is that Johnny Depp himself did the voice of Sparrow, but it seemed as though Depp had had WAY too much pirate-ness and was bored to frickin' tears while recording. Instead of the foppishly creative, semi-drunk Jack, we get the "Eh, I'm not sure i really care anymore" apathetic and really sleepy Jack.
Controls....are nonexistant. No camera, and basic controls are button-mash and slash your sword until the enemy falls over. There are some cool puzzle things, like bombs and lots and lots and lots of fire, but the puzzles are either lackluster and boring or impossibly hard because you overlook one tiny detail.
Gamespot's review is a little generous: a 6. I would've given it a 3 just because it's not very fun to play at all. A game is supposed to instill in the player a drive to reach the last level, the last boss, and save the princess...metaphorically speaking. This game falls flat through the pier and sinks miserably into the ocean.
(I'll put a pic here when i can. Work computers suck!)
Basically, you're Jack and Will and Lizzy, in some asinine story that doesn't even make sense. Jack and the others are strung by their necks by...someone....and Jack is trying to get out of it by telling a batch of nonsequiter stories, including when Elizabeth's house got raided by pirates. Despite Lizzy's voice-over remark ("I don't remember any of that happening!") Jack is shown saving Miss Swann's life while her posh house burns. And she can fight with a sword. Next scene, Will and Jack are traipsing through some jungle trying to find a treasure, for no reason. There's even an ice level and a Far East level, but that's as far as i got before i gave the game away to someone else.
The selling point of the game is that Johnny Depp himself did the voice of Sparrow, but it seemed as though Depp had had WAY too much pirate-ness and was bored to frickin' tears while recording. Instead of the foppishly creative, semi-drunk Jack, we get the "Eh, I'm not sure i really care anymore" apathetic and really sleepy Jack.
Controls....are nonexistant. No camera, and basic controls are button-mash and slash your sword until the enemy falls over. There are some cool puzzle things, like bombs and lots and lots and lots of fire, but the puzzles are either lackluster and boring or impossibly hard because you overlook one tiny detail.
Gamespot's review is a little generous: a 6. I would've given it a 3 just because it's not very fun to play at all. A game is supposed to instill in the player a drive to reach the last level, the last boss, and save the princess...metaphorically speaking. This game falls flat through the pier and sinks miserably into the ocean.
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